Getting stuck at the kids' table
According to this Seattle Times article, single and childfree family members often wind up sitting at the kids table during holiday meals.
Childless adults and singles sometimes get stuck at the kids' table.Wow. This has never happened to me. You? I'm curious to hear how other childfree people get treated by their families during the holiday season. Is there always pressure? Do you get treated like your lives are less interesting than those with kids? Or is your family extra wonderful when it comes to respecting you for who you are? (Leave your email address or contact me if you'd be willing to talk about this for an article.) [LINK]Sticking unmarried members at the kids table is a form of discrimination, says social psychologist Bella DePaulo, Ph.D., author of "Singled Out" ($24.95, St. Martin's Press.)
Many hosts don't think twice about sending an unmarried aunt to the kids' table. DePaulo says it's part of a cultural lag from the 1950s. In the past, the single years were considered a transitional time between adolescence and adulthood. Now DePaulo says many adults spend more adult years single than married.
Being single or childless is more common these days, but DePaulo says some families haven't caught up with the times.
3 Comments:
My immediate family (mom and brother) are fine with it. My extended family is self-centered and child-rearing. I rarely see them.
First, who goes to family events where there is a childs table???? It's never happened to me. Ever. Ok, maybe once. I was sat in an adults table. But if someone decided that I should sit at the 'children's' table, I'd pick up my seat (hopefully adults sized) and move to another table.
As for 'interesting' vs 'less interesting', I'd say that people in general think of childless lives as more interesting than childed lives. Just my opinion.
At family functions, my kids sit at the table with everyone else. There is no kid's table. It gives the childless members of the extended family a chance to spend some time with the kids, it gives the kids a chance to see what grown-ups are like. When they get bored or restless, we let them toddle off to play. The very idea of a "Kid's Table" is ridiculous.
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